Valentine’s Day is being redefined and shoppers are embracing it on their own terms. New Lightspeed Commerce data shows that consumers are moving away from pressure-driven gifting and instead using the holiday as a moment for self-care and self-gifting.
Valentine’s Day pressure is fading:
- Nearly two thirds of North American consumers (62%) feel little to no pressure to spend money on Valentine’s Day. Instead, most shoppers are approaching the holiday comfortably and intentionally.
- More than half (57%) say they simply spend what feels comfortable to them.
- Nearly a quarter (23%) say they do not think about Valentine’s Day spending at all.
Self-gifting is already mainstream:
- Buying for yourself is no longer a fringe behaviour.
- More than one in four consumers (27%) say they have already bought themselves a Valentine’s Day gift, and another 8% say they might this year.
- In fact, 13% of shoppers explicitly say they buy Valentine’s Day gifts for themselves.
Self-care leads self-gifting choices:
- When shoppers do treat themselves, their purchases reflect classic self-care habits.
- Over a third buy clothing or accessories (35%).
- One quarter purchase beauty or self-care products (25%).
- Nearly one third treat themselves to a nice meal or takeout (32%).
- Some go further, with 13% booking spa treatments or massages.
Valentine’s Day budgets remain modest, with most shoppers planning to spend under $100. This reinforces a shift toward small indulgences that feel good rather than extravagant gestures.
John Shapiro, Chief Product and Technology Officer of Lightspeed, said the decline in pressure-driven Valentine’s Day spending reflects a broader shift toward more intentional, self-directed consumer behaviour.
“Shoppers are approaching the holiday with less obligation and more autonomy, which has led to a wider and more diverse range of spending patterns. Valentine’s Day is no longer just about buying a gift for a partner, it’s equally about self-gifting, gifts for children, or even spoiling pets,” he said.
“This shift mirrors what we’re seeing more broadly across retail, where consumers are prioritizing financial control and emotional value over performative or expectation-driven spending. Rather than spending to meet external norms, shoppers are making conscious choices about how, or whether, Valentine’s Day fits into their lives. As a result, the holiday is becoming less about social pressure and more about personal meaning, flexibility, and choice.”
Shapiro said retailers should stop treating self-gifting as a niche behaviour and start designing for it intentionally.
“We found more than one in four consumers are buying Valentine’s Day gifts for themselves, with that increasing substantially for Gen Z (55%). The opportunity is clear; merchandising, messaging, and product bundles should find a balance between romantic gesture and self-care; think small moments of indulgence rather than romantic obligation. Retailers that make it easy for shoppers to justify a purchase “for themselves” will be more suited for the various demands consumers are looking for,” he said.
Shapiro said self-care-focused purchases highlight how consumers are redefining value during the holiday season as something increasingly emotional rather than purely transactional.
“Items like clothing, beauty products, meals, and small indulgences continue to dominate self-gifting because they deliver immediate, personal satisfaction and a sense of control,” he said.
“Rather than chasing the biggest deal or the most extravagant purchase, consumers are prioritizing how a purchase makes them feel; whether that’s comfort, confidence, or a moment of relief. There’s a growing desire to feel good about where money is being spent, not just how much is being saved. This reinforces the idea that value today is defined by relevance and emotional resonance, not by price tags or grand gestures, especially during holidays.”
Shapiro said most shoppers plan to spend under $100, which creates a strong case for thoughtfully priced bundles, experiential framing, and clear use cases. Highlighting “treat yourself” moments with limited-edition items or small premium touches like product personalization can help brands maintain margin while still meeting shopper expectations. Shoppers are willing to spend; they just want their purchases to feel intentional.
“This shift toward more intentional and self-focused spending appears to be a lasting change rather than a temporary trend. It aligns closely with several data points we’ve observed across the retail landscape, particularly among younger demographics who are increasingly willing to redefine traditional cultural norms around shopping and gift-giving. Rather than reserving indulgent purchases for special occasions, these consumers are finding more frequent opportunities throughout the year to treat themselves in ways that feel meaningful and justified,” he explained.
“We’ve seen this behaviour reflected in our “valuespending” data, where shoppers are making more deliberate, value-driven purchasing decisions that prioritize personal relevance and long-term satisfaction over impulse buying. This mindset has also shown up in recent Black Friday trends, where consumers were increasingly likely to shop for themselves alongside, or even instead of, buying gifts for others. Taken together, these signals suggest a broader evolution in consumer behavior, one that emphasizes intentionality, personal reward, and redefining what value looks like in today’s retail environment.”
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